Comtemplation

I forgot that I had a blog (blogs actually), and how to blog… lol

Two thoughts came to mind:

1. Should I delete and let it be history?
2. Private necessary ones (too many tbh) and keep it runnin’

Though I have a third thought:

• New blog, new pseudonym
• With the theme – to help people, in anyway a blog can
• Dedicate minimal time to it (Dota2 took much of it – sad to say)

Well, we’ll see how it goes.

p/s — It’s scary to see and read back over the years
pp/s — Thanks to my blog’s stats, it is interesting to see keywords that people use to reach this blog. Particularly this one. Who the hell is stalking me?

eXP

There are many …

There are many things in life one is envious about. how others seem to be moving forward. how others seem to be chalking up milestones.

All one has done is cock up at every single stage of life, been given multitude chances, never succeeding in any. It is frustrating when we use others achievements as a barometer of what one “should” or should not strive for. One is disappointed that one did not see the light early on. at least 15 years earlier. one is filled with much despair and angst. One would like to find respite despite one’s shortcomings and insecurities.

Happy Winter Solstice Day!

Tangyuen! w00t. Gotta make ’em when I wake up later. Lol. It’s 3:32am in teh morning now. @_@

Oh yeah, for the record, I wrote a Xmas card and it’s on the way overseas. Kthxbai.

 

p/s — I should really grow a pair. Like that also nervous. Gee Gee la.

 

— eXPeri3nc3

Headache

Yes… headache.

Digital Vanity

I’m good at coming up with good titles. Lol. Look what I just did. Vanity at its best.=)

The farewell

Lol wanted to use a catchier title but in the end resorted to a short and concise post title.

Ommmmm

MPC is playing Shurangama Mantra in the background.

It’s been a long time since I blogged, and also, write in my diary. Sorta lost contact since my night shift 2 months ago. It’s all downhill from there in my thought & writing process. Lol. Amazing what working life can do to me.

Anyhow, it came to me that events will determine how a particular person react. Also, pre-determined habitual acts will shape the thoughts of oneself today and it goes on. It is sort of like dependent-arising. With the cause in the past comes the action in the present and further chain of reaction in the future.

I guess the only way to tackle it is to change the present and hope for the best in near future (I said in near future as it may not appear in an instant).

So I guess for the remaining month, I’ll stare for as long as I have to. Lol. I wonder if anyone actually reads what I type. I’m not anonymous (at all), but I hope that no one will be stalking (not that it matters). Just that, if I wanted to be safe I would have password protect and all that stuff. If it really mattered. Lol.

That’s what happens when work overcomes reality. You start to get paranoid at times. Security. That’s my job scope. But yet, it amuses me when humans are particularly good at one and one thing only, being stupid.

Look at the recent rally. It never ceases to amuse me that there are such ignorant people out there (I Was following life feeds from Twitter in regards to the rally cos I am stuck at home anyway). Then the country also ran by political monkeys. Quite sad.

Don’t get me wrong. I love Malaysia. I just hate the way people run the country.

I have yet to pick up my old hobby again: Cards and Rubiks. Though I seem to be interested in memorising the keypress for piano. The wedding tone. =D Lol thanks to smrr00. Man her plays are awesome. She plays from what she hears, initially, for the videos she normally release. If you haven’t visit her Youtube channel, be sure to check it out. Regardless if you’re a Kpop fan or not. Link: http://www.youtube.com/user/smrr00

So, I should sleep. Enjoy the last days of potential limitless joy (if only) as well as appreciate the fact that I am not the last to know =) Man I’m getting good at appreciating things already. Lol. Only the acceptance part may need some reworking.

I also realise that no matter how low my self-esteem can go, I am still way more awesome than most people =D True story.

Cheers. God I miss NZ weather and the fresh air. Well, what to do, I’m in the middle of concrete jungle.

Good night. Annyeonghijumuseyo yeorobun! Oyasuminasai minna!

With love,

eXPeri3nc3

Dead for 2 months

… or rather been too busy as well as out of this world. Lol.

Seriously, I didn’t even write in my diary anymore ever since the Alliance Engagement.

Anyhow, this is like what happened during this period:
– Worked night shift in Cyberjaya for close to one month, thanks to that almost turned gay because I face my male colleague like 18 hours a day
– Car accident – an asshole bang me and ran
– Foot accident – cut my foot, bleed like mad, surgery costed RM7k
– Went to NZ for PT for Fisher & Paykel – Just came back yesterday

It’s been hell of a two months. The kicker? My beloved Manager is leaving the firm. =(

That is pretty depressing to be truthful. But things will come and go I guess. It’s just like the Wheel. Always turning unless you break out of the cycle (reach enlightenment / Nirvana).

… and I think I have a crush on my manager. I would really be happy when she’s around regardless. IDK why, not sure if it’s my delusional thoughts, or my screwed up hormones, pity, but yeah. Lol. Either way it should not happen and will not happen anyway. But still, am trying very hard so that it doesn’t affect the better of me.

Talk about early-20s crisis. Lol.

NZ is nice. Air is clean and cold. Winter there. Scenery quite nice. Green. Simple life. So peaceful. Slow paced. But expensive due to conversion.

… and yeah, I kidnapped a lamb for her. I think I’m just being foolish at times lol.

Ahhhh. Whatever.

Gonna sleep. Bye world.

p/s — Life is short. Really. Ever since the two accident I will never look at life the same through those rose-coloured glasses.

eXPeri3nc3

Search and Replace Text with Notepad++ Regex Boundary

http://stackoverflow.com/questions/283608/using-regex-to-prefix-and-append-in-notepad

For archiving purposes. =D

The Revival

I chose “The Revival” as this post’s title mainly for a few reasons *that suddenly crossed my mind out of the blue*:

1. It’s been donkey years since I last blogged,
2. Although I doubt I have readers for my personal rant, I guess it’s a good practice to just blog,
3. My sleeping time is officially screwed (more on that later), and this feels like University times
4. I am trying to revive a lot of stuff (from the past in a good manner)

First of all, to my readers out there (if any), I humbly apologise for this delayed post. Overdue like months. Lol. Mainly was because I am either busy, working, sleeping, cybercafe-ing (or in other words DotA-ing), or whatever you can think of (e.g. emo). I used to blog waaaaay more, guess that working life is indeed a bit taxing at times (lol auditors are worse off).